rockerest’s Twitter Archive—№ 16,060

In light of today's Apple Card announcement, I have a very short story to tell you: I got an Apple card to buy a gift. Let's do some rounding and say the gift was $2000. I made a single $460 payment. Then, we returned the item. After THREE MONTHS, I was refunded $1940.
Permalink On twitter.com ♻️ 1 Retweets ❤️ 3 Favorites 2021 Apr 20 Mood +4 🙂

…in reply to @rockerest
I haven't contacted anyone about this, because I assume this is simply the tax for doing business with Apple.
Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Apr 20 Mood 0

…in reply to @rockerest
. AppleCard AppleSupport I guess I might as well mention you here, since I suppose this is still bothering me.
Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Apr 20 Mood 0

…in reply to @rockerest
A slightly relevant aside: the bills that you get with an Apple card are very nearly incomprehensible. I'll post a redacted screenshot later. It's some of the most insane "accounting" I've ever seen. Worse (?), the account view on card.apple.com is essentially worthless.
Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Apr 20 Mood -9 🙁

…in reply to @rockerest
You can only view your transactions in a meaningful way on an iPhone, which is an insanely elitist way to provide insight into one's financials.
Permalink On twitter.com ❤️ 1 Favorite 2021 Apr 20 Mood +2 🙂

…in reply to @rockerest
Let's begin - as one does - at the beginning: with the first statement post-purchase. I bought two items as a gift, and the invoice manages to be 4 pages including your standard page of legalese. Three full pages for two transactions! Let's inspect, shall we?
Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Apr 20 Mood +2 🙂

…in reply to @rockerest
Page 1 is... well it's pretty good, I guess. There's tons of wasted space, but I guess it's understandable. (Spoiler alert, each statement is exactly like this, including the wasted space and 4 page length. Even statements where the statement is just "your balance is $0")
Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Apr 20 Mood +1 🙂

…in reply to @rockerest
Anyway, moving on to page 2. This is where the real shitshow begins. What is "daily cash"? Why is it accumulating like a regular credit charge (e.g. a "positive" number) and not something else? Why is the first meaningful page of breakdown values something other than
Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Apr 20 Mood +6 🙂

…in reply to @rockerest
- you know - the things I purchased? Are you trying to tell me that for using your card, I owe you $147.84 on TOP of the actual purchase amounts? Honestly what is even happening here.
Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Apr 20 Mood +2 🙂

…in reply to @rockerest
Anyway, let's move on to page 3. Aha, actual transactions! Cool, cool, and I see "Daily Cash" here, too. Thank God the 3% values are actually correct... but wait, these Daily Cash amounts are *different* than the Daily cash amounts from above? What?
Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Apr 20 Mood +5 🙂

…in reply to @rockerest
And wait, you're telling me I have a total balance of $1995.84, but I only financed $1848.00? So where did the extra $147.84 come from? Oh, it's the "Daily Cash" number from page 2? But... that number came from nowhere, too. It doesn't match up with the "Daily Cash" values
Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Apr 20 Mood 0

…in reply to @rockerest
...from the "Card" or from the "Monthly Installments", which sums to $59.88 (a value which apparently is never relevant again in this statement, but which we should all tuck away for later).
Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Apr 20 Mood 0

…in reply to @rockerest
It's worth noting that the cost of the goods purchased was $1848 - which is listed as the "Total financed". Got it. So this "Daily Cash" thing is some sort of use-of-credit fee assigned on top, as an additional charge.
Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Apr 20 Mood +4 🙂

…in reply to @rockerest
So far: Purchased $1848 of Apple garbage. Charged $1995.84 for it. Let's move on to January's statement.
Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Apr 20 Mood -4 🙁

…in reply to @rockerest
Here's January, sans legalese page at the end.
Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Apr 20 Mood 0

…in reply to @rockerest
Right away, we have a problem. The account balance shows $0, but - as you'll learn later - the balance of refunds and payments *should* be somewhere below that. One return (for $1499) had already cleared, as had a regular payment for $450.
Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Apr 20 Mood -1 🙁

…in reply to @rockerest
Astute readers will note that - based on the original purchases - ( $1848 - $1499 - $450 ) = -$101. Okay, but what about the Daily Cash fee, you say!? Sharp! This was financed at 0% interest for 12 months, but indeed, let's factor in this gotcha fee from Apple/Goldman.
Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Apr 20 Mood +1 🙂

…in reply to @rockerest
For the $1499 item - now returned - the Daily Cash fee was $44.97. Let's also assume that the larger of the two *previous* Daily Cash fees assessed was also for this item: $3.60. So this is a total fee assessed of $48.57. That's a bit over 3%, which - if assessed per month -
Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Apr 20 Mood 0

…in reply to @rockerest
is just an absolute abysmal credit rate. I could potentially borrow from a predatory payday loan joint and get better interest rates. Okay but anyway, let's add that "Daily Cash" fee reversal into the "refunds" to see what the balance should be:
Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Apr 20 Mood +1 🙂

…in reply to @rockerest
( $1995.85 - $1499 - $450 - $48.57 ) = -$1.72 I'll be honest, though, there's *something else* on Page 2 of January's statement. For the life of me I cannot determine what is on that page, but it's something else. From the various amounts, what it looks like is Apple/Goldman is
Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Apr 20 Mood +4 🙂

…in reply to @rockerest
assessing that "Daily Cash" fee on BOTH ends: I'm charged $44.97 for a (RETURN) row, then refunded -$119.92 for another (RETURN) row (but they also assess an additional $3.60 Daily Cash fee on that refund of the Daily Cash fee 🥴)
Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Apr 20 Mood -3 🙁

…in reply to @rockerest
Finally on page 3 we get to the installment items: $349 for one item, and then $0 for one item that's returned (+$1499 + -$1499). But because we're doing math with funny money here, the balance is... $142.67! ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Apr 20 Mood +4 🙂

…in reply to @rockerest
The one saving grace here is there's $0 in the Daily Cash section. Thank the Lord for this one silver lining.
Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Apr 20 Mood +3 🙂

…in reply to @rockerest
So far: Purchased $1848 of Apple garbage. Charged $1995.84 for it. Paid $450. Returned an item for $1499. Balance listed as $0. Balance ALSO listed as -$24.51 🤪 Should be owed between $1.72 and $101.
Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Apr 20 Mood -4 🙁

…in reply to @rockerest
So let's move on to February's statement (sans page 4 of legalese).
Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Apr 20 Mood 0

…in reply to @rockerest
I'm already exhausted of this by now, so here's the summary: - More Daily Cash fuckery. - Refund of the total amount of the final return ($349) I've genuinely lost the plot entirely at this stage. I suspect that's the point of these statements.
Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Apr 20 Mood -6 🙁

…in reply to @rockerest
So far: Purchased $1848 of Apple garbage. Charged $1995.84 for it. Paid $450. Returned both items for $1848. Balance listed as $0. Balance ALSO listed as -$390.12 🤪 ---- Just to recap the recap: I bought AND returned $1848 of goods. I paid $450 of American dollars.
Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Apr 20 Mood -4 🙁

…in reply to @rockerest
So let's take a quick look at March's statement, which should close out the account, no?
Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Apr 20 Mood -1 🙁

…in reply to @rockerest
Once again, I don't have the energy for this, so here's the summary: - Refunded the balance they list ($390.12) - Everything is zeroed, according to them.
Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Apr 20 Mood 0

…in reply to @rockerest
So: Purchase $1499 + Purchase $349 - Pay $450 - Return $1848 + Refund $390.12 -------------------- = $0.00 This is Apple/Goldman Sachs math.
Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Apr 20 Mood -1 🙁

…in reply to @rockerest
Remember the Daily Cash amount from earlier we tucked away that came to $59.88? Recall that it was just one of many Daily Cash numbers that got thrown around, so positive, some negative. But this one in particular... it's the difference between $450 & $390.12.
Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Apr 20 Mood 0

…in reply to @rockerest
So for a zero interest for 12 months deal, the interest is: 3.24%
Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Apr 20 Mood +2 🙂

…in reply to @rockerest
I don't even know what the takeaway is here. Some thoughts: - I've always despised Apple. Nothing has changed. - I've always despised Goldman Sachs. Nothing has changed. - These statements are remarkably bad. Like, basically every inch has something wrong with it.
On twitter.com 2021 Apr 20 Mood -3 🙁

…in reply to @rockerest
- It's not even always something _incorrect_, it's just... bad. Bad layout, bad design, and bad logical formatting. - I'm not going to purchase from Apple again unless under duress.
Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Apr 20 Mood -12 🙁